Communication Similarities and Differences

                                                

The communication assessments this week taught me a lot about perceptions. I learned that those close to me have very similar perceptions about the way I communicate. In terms of communication anxiety, I perceive myself the same way they perceive me. 

What surprised me the most was my result for the verbal aggressiveness test. My score was described as someone who is argumentativeness which attacks a person’s position or statements and involves personal attacks and can be hurtful to the listener. My husband and sister both perceived me not so aggressive as this way but for some reason I perceived myself as more aggressive when answering the questions. When I read the description of the results from their test I felt that their results describes me better than significance. I feel that I do maintain good balance between respect and consideration for others viewpoints. I also try my best not to attack people unless I disagree with something they may have said. 

This week I learned that sometimes our responses to people's viewpoints can affect our communication skills. If you verbally attack someone they may never want to speak to you again. Although you may get a shocking result on an assessment it does not mean that you should accept the results. The score may show a small percentage of a skill in you that can be positive and negative and it is up to you to see if you want people to perceive you that or not. 

Communication and Cultural Diversity

I often find myself communicating differently with people from different groups and cultures. Most of my family and friends are Nigerian and when I am around them I find myself speaking in a Nigerian accent. I also tend to use more eye gestures and hand gestures that is very common among Nigerians. Also, I tend to not use proper English grammar when communicating with them.

At work I am surrounded by people of diverse backgrounds. I notice that I use less eye and hand gestures. I also speak more politely and with proper English. I am calmer when speaking with my colleagues, whereas at home or with family I can be louder and raise my voice if in disagreement.

Three strategies I can use to communicate more effectively with these groups:

1. I can work on not raising my voice with anyone even if they are my family. I do not like it when I get loud and neither does anyone around me.

2. Another strategy is that I can try to be more comfortable at work. I should focus more on having a positive and effective communication with my colleagues instead of how they will react if I use hand or eye gestures. Most of us are very comfortable with each other so I can try and be more comfortable when communicating.

3. One last strategy is that I can listen more and be more aware of the communication skills of others. If I am in disagreement I can listen to what others are saying before raising my voice and trying to get my point across. Raising my voice can also negatively impact my communication and may not be the communication skill of someone else. If I am the only one raising my voice then I am not communicating effectively. 

Sound Off, Sound On

Sound Off

For this assignment I watched an episode of Drop Dead Diva. There seemed to be a lot going on in the show. I can tell that there are two main characters. One is a skinny blond hair girl who seems to care about the way she looks. When the show started she was trying on a dress but from her facial expressions she wasn't sure about how she looked or fit in it and it appeared that she asked her significant other how she looks and he gave her a hug and kiss so I’m assuming he told her she looks great. She also looked as if she was interviewing to be on a show similar to Price is Right because she was studying the models. She is driving and applying makeup and also on the phone I can see her mouth moving and the Bluetooth headset in her ear when she crashes into a truck carrying oranges. Next, there is a brunette lady who is slightly obese at an office who seems to not care much about her looks.  She seems to get along with one coworker who I think is her secretary because she helped her get a few things and they seemed comfortable near each other. There is another coworker who seems to think she is better than the rest from the way she looks at them. The brunette spills coffee and walks out her office to get a napkin when she sees the rest of her colleagues hiding from a man with a gun. She seems worried but walks toward the armed man. When she walks towards him she trips over a bag and he shoots her.

They show the blonde girl in what appears to be heaven because everything and everyone is in white. She presses a return button on a computer keyboard and she disappears. Next we see the brunette girl in a hospital going through surgery; she wakes up, and looks in a mirror and from the look on her face and her mouth she seems to be screaming. I assumed that it is the blond girl in the brunette girl’s body.

Sound On

My assumptions about the characters and plot based on my observations were correct. The blonde girl was a model auditioning for the price is right. The blonde girl did care about the way she looked. The brunette girl did not care about the way she looked and she did work in a law firm. One coworker was her secretary and the other coworker did think she was better than the rest of them. They did both die and the blonde girl did end up in the brunette’s body.

I think my assumptions would have been right on target if I had been watching a show I already know because I would already know the characters. I would know what each character does, how they react when happy or sad and who they are close with. Nonetheless, even though I have never watched the show paying attention to their facial expressions helped me to understand the character’s communication and what was going on during the show. 

Competent Communicator

A person who demonstrates competent communication is my pastor. My pastor’s name is Jide Lawore. He has been a pastor for over 7 years and I always admire him when he speaks. He is a great public speaker. My pastor speaks eloquently and always annunciates his words; it is also easy to understand him whenever he speaks or preaches. When my pastor communicates, he makes eye contact and makes you feel at ease. He doesn’t speak too fast or too slow and he always offers explanations if you do not know. He is also humorous and not uptight whether he is speaking to you in private or in public.

I would definitely want to model some of my own communication behaviors after my pastor. I get shy sometimes, but my pastor always seems so comfortable when communicating. He is bold and he draws your attention when he speaks. The more I watch and hear him speak, the more I want to be just as competent as he is.